Chapter 12: A Relationship, Marijuana and 23-Year Old Female Comedian Walk Into a Bar…
I caved. I got a cell phone. It’s 2002- who knows? These things might actually become the norm. My plan includes 200 minutes Mon-Fri, and unlimited calls after 6pm and on weekends. Since I want to keep the bill down, I’m not giving my number to my boss and family. They can still believe I […]
Chapter 11: Too Soon
I’m 22 years old and three years into comedy. Cell phones are becoming more popular, and not just something only dads and cab drivers have. I am vehemently against getting one. Hell no. The thought of people being able to get ahold of me 24/7 scares the shit out of me. Straight from my diary, […]
Chapter 10- Let Me See You Twirl
It was hard to believe my Ford Festiva was surviving Ontario winters, but it was. As a broke 21 year old girl, I believed oil changes were a luxury, possibly even a myth. I was more focused on the price of gas. My dad used to tell me to go to Chevron, but considering he […]
Chapter 9: What Are You Wearing?
I was starting to get more comfortable hanging out at Yuk Yuk’s. The wait staff finally knew my name (they probably warmed up to me after I stopped standing in their way,) and I was enjoying singing my newly written Britney parody song in the greenroom. (To the tune of “I’m Not A Girl, Not […]
Chapter 8: Comedy Before The “Women Support Women” Movement
I recently saw a friend promoting a fellow woman’s new comedy album. I slid into her DM’s right away. “I’m excited to check it out! How is it?” Then she confessed she hadn’t actually listened to it. This is a pretty amazing development. Women just support each other now? You don’t ask 82 people to […]
Chapter 7: My First Paycheck From Comedy
There’s something about making money doing what you love that means more than the actual dollar amount. I know several comedians who gave up perfectly stable and respectable jobs to have a shot at telling jokes for forty bucks. No sense torturing yourself at a 9 to 5 job when you can torture yourself in […]
Chapter 6: The First Comedian I Ever Dated
When you first start comedy a woman who’s either another comic or a form of God will come up to you and say, “Don’t date the comics.” But just like that paperwork you signed when you got hired at McDonalds that says you are not to engage in personal relationships with fellow staff, you immediately […]
Chapter 5: Revenge of the Nerves
If you’ve made it this far, I want to thank you. I have a feeling a lot of people just like the pictures on Instagram, but don’t actually open this blog. I had no idea I’m seeking a niche audience… readers. I already need to print a retraction. I should mention that here in New […]
Chapter 4: I’ll Be The Best Three Minutes of Your Life
My only goal was to get on that stage. To get up against that brick wall in a basement on Albert Street, mere blocks from Capital Hill. I was in the right neighborhood to do political material, but I decided to stick to what I know- having small boobs and a recent loss of virginity. […]
Chapter 3: I’m Telling You For the First Time
Some time between my last day of university and my first time smoking pot, Jerry Seinfeld came out with a special called “I’m Telling You For the Last Time.” It was his way of putting to bed a bunch of material he didn’t want to do anymore. (Garry Shandling stealing jokes out of the coffin […]